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Zirkle Time: Crazy Is As Crazy Chats With The South Bend Tribune

Goofball In case you were worried about having a nutterball or two to kick around this election season, give a big ol' round of applause to Tony Zirkle, the Playboy-shredding Second District wingnut who advocated the return of the guillotine during the 2006 cycle. (He ultimately lost to Count Chocula in the primary, but not before getting a surprising 30 percent of the vote.)

The South Bend Tribune reports:

South Bend attorney Tony Zirkle will run for Congress this year -- his second attempt at the job.

Zirkle, a Republican, ran for the Republican nomination in the 2006 primary but lost to then-U.S. Rep. Chris Chocola, the incumbent.

Chocola was defeated in the general election later that year by Democrat Joe Donnelly, who now represents Indiana's 2nd District.

Eliminating pornography and prostitution was a centerpiece of Zirkle's 2006 campaign, and he gained attention by shredding a copy of Playboy magazine featuring Marilyn Monroe on the cover.

But perhaps his most memorable suggestion was bringing back the guillotine to punish child sex offenders.

"There was a lot of misunderstanding about what I said about the guillotine," Zirkle said Wednesday by phone. "If you look at my original press release, I said I was attempting to stimulate debate."

That's not to say he's pulling back those comments. Zirkle said Wednesday that although he's not in favor of capital punishment except in the most extreme cases, the guillotine is a fast way of executing someone.

"It's not very pretty," he said, "but if you want to execute someone as painlessly as possible, that may be the most efficient way to do it."

Zirkle said he would focus on eliminating pornography and prostitution in the upcoming campaign, which he plans to start in earnest in a couple of weeks. At the moment, he's tied down with some litigation, he said.

Zirkle said, in essence, that pornography is prostitution, as the actors and models get paid, in essence, for sex.

"If I go to the corner and I pay $20 for a prostitute down on South Michigan Street, that gets you thrown in prison," he said. "How does a video camera make the same act, when you're charging more money, automatically legal?"

Zirkle's campaign message in a nutshell: "I'm not necessarily for bringing back the guillotine, but if we're going to have capital punishment, I'm all for whacking people's heads off, which is not to say that I in any way support whacking off in general if it involves porn, which I believe is the equivalent of a $20 blowjob down on South Michigan Street."

Perhaps he should just combine all his issues and lobby for the institution of the death penalty for anyone who buys the latest issue of "Barely Legal."

Comments

Thanks for the free press coverage. My "middle" name is a riddle wrapped in an enigma. The middle "v" stands for vs., so it 3 letters versus 3 letters.

Hey, I remember the $20 S. Michigan St. Specials!

so this "Arnold" Ziffle wants to join the 2nd oldest profession to eliminate the 1st oldest profession? ohhh the irony.
whats he got against consenting adults having sex.
btw- if you arent sure if a woman on the street is a hoker, or a cop, invite her over for a nude modeling session- paid, of course. If the woman is a cop, they will refuse. dont ask me why, but signing a model release is art.
why are fighting a war over in the middle east against radical religious fundamentlaist extremism; kool-aid drinking nutjobs;when we are having so much trouble with them over here, trying to destroy america?
and what do they all have against fun and frolicking? cant get laid? sorry about your luck. I guess he thinks as a congressman, he can get laid all the time in washington?
or married, and wife wont 'sleep with him, so he's going to inflict his misery on the rest of us? sheesh!
take mark souder...please.
(thank you henny youngman!) giggle!

Where did he get a copy of Playboy with Marilyn Monroe?

Was it in mint condition? Or very much USED?

I see that the "Zirk" is back and ready to save humanity. What would an election year be without these interestingly scary types?
The following link shows all of the state and federal filings and I would like somebody to figure out what Zirkle's middle name is.

http://www.in.gov/sos/elections/pdfs/2008candidate/Abbrev_Candidate_List_013108.pdf

I am guessing that it is code for cutting off heads. I am sure the the Rep. party will challenge his filing under a false name.

Donnelly demonstrates that hard work and good constituent contact pays off. This is a guy that even his own side underestimated.

At this point the only other candidate in the race for the Republicans is a Goshen businessman (a self described "opportunist") who was going to run last year but pulled out shortly after starting to lay the groundwork. Now, after blowing eight months of precious time, he is back in. Although Zirkle is not likely to have any real money (he ran last time on $200 and a credit card, seriously) he does have name i.d. What if Zirkle is the nominee?

But he drives a Prius.

Now I am nervous... this won't be applied retroactively will it?

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